My response to my husband’s boxers on the bathroom floor is not battle of flesh and blood.
When I was younger… I was loud, bold, free and was not good at organization.
My room was fun and to me that was messy play and toys everywhere! Can you relate? Was your room messy as a kid too?
I was told “It’s a pigsty in here” but my perception was “you are too much, why can’t you EVEN, you are a pig, it’s a bother to help you clean it”
A simple comment not meaning anything was a seed that the enemy used to take root into my heart.
What agent do you think I used to cover the pain of being seen as “insert weakness”. It was FOOD!
Now insert the boxers on the floor as a married woman at 34 years old. Me getting angry about them is really just fear “what will people think of me if they come over and his boxers are on the floor.”
I’m learning that anger is a body guard for fear. So now, when anger comes up, I get curious about what fear is behind the anger.
Fear is a mask for sadness. It covers up the broken parts in our hearts. So, the boxers on the floor and me getting angry goes back to a root of being seen as messy and being told something as a little girl.
Instead of choosing to act on the anger, I am using a weapon of warfare it’s called love!
This is more about my healing than anything else. This is me choosing to understand the why’s behind the emotions that surface. This is me recognizing roots that get to come out. This is me becoming aware of why I choose to turn to food. This is me saying I have left things lay too and I am choosing to rejoice in the fact that I can come along side the person I love most.
My husband does the dishes, makes the bed, homeschools our children, provides an income for our family, is doing a renovation for a rental home and he leaves his boxers on the floor. The anger that comes out over the boxers actually has very little to do with him!
I dare you to be brave, to and get curious when anger comes, and see if there too is a fear covering it up. Can you relate to this? Come on over to this wonderful community of women working on themselves to uncover their relationship with food to find freedom in Christ.
XO,
Megan
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